This morning started out like any other morning. Rolled out of bed, stumbled down the stairs, dog in toe, and made myself comfortable on the couch to spend some quiet time reading my bible and praying. I usually come with the expectation of hearing from God. He typically talks to me during these moments, by highlighting verses that just stop me in my tracks. This morning it was:
The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world. – John 1:9
Normally I would’ve read right over this verse, but this morning I was unable to ignore it. I tried to read on, but my mind couldn’t let go of these words. I kept thinking, as a christian I have accepted Christ into my life as my Lord and Savior; therefore, if he is the light, shouldn’t his light be shining through me. Talk about feeling convicted.
I started to think of all the things that could be blocking his light from being seen by those in my life and it’s simple, my sins, my fears, my insecurities, my doubts, my self talk, these are all like bugs on a windshield that block God’s light from shining through. My soul was brought to it’s knees immediately.
I am guilty of knowing the true Light, storing it nice and cozy within me, only bringing it out in company that agrees, and storing it back in it’s comfy box until next time. I don’t think God is telling me or expecting me to preach at everyone I meet, in fact as a christian this has always been a turn off to me. Jesus did not point fingers in a thou shalt not, or how dare you do that, sort of way. In fact when I read his word I sense the tone of a mother gently correcting her children, with love.
Lately, I feel God has been working on me in this area. I am one to not say something or do something in fear of what others will think, or say. Up until this past year, I would catch myself acting a certain way around different people to gain their approval, to make sure they liked me. I would never do anything that wasn’t right, but I would hold parts of me back because what would they say if they knew.
This morning, these words came to the surface…
If I have accepted Christ as my savior and call myself a christian (if it needs a label), then why do I compartmentalize him. If he is the one who gives me life, why do I only allow him to shine when it’s convenient for me?
I think this might be the whole purpose of him drawing me to begin this blog. This is the most I have ever been outspoken about my faith. Yes I never hid it, but I have never been this transparent about it. Even with this blog, knowing that this is what God has called me to do, I catch myself trying to sugar coat things, or pretend that I have it all together, well friend, stick around long enough and you will see this christian girl is far from perfect.
This world needs a light source. The world can be so dark sometimes and it seems it gets darker by the minute. Shouldn’t I be doing things allowing his light to illuminate the dark? Shouldn’t I be looking beyond myself and my own needs and try to see and meet the needs of others around me that need to see a little light in their current situation?
I’m not quite sure what this looks like, but I’m open to try anything. A smile. A simple “hello”. A listening ear.
I do believe that actions speak louder than words, and I’ve always believed that it is through acts of kindness and love that people will truly see the love of God and will know that I am different.
I would love some ideas on how you “light shiners” are shining your light. What acts of kindness have you done or are in the habit of doing to bring a little light into a dark world? Let me know in the comment section below.
Until next time…